Malletti

Venue: Malletti, Noel Street

Food: Italian pasta/pizza

Cost: £4.95/£3.95

Rating: 80%

This review of Malletti Pizzeria, to give the establishment its full and proper name, has a great deal of expectation and pressure upon it.  Not only will my regular accomplice and colleague (SB) who first introduced me to the world of Malletti’s be casting his eye over it, but he has also tipped off the staff to expect the review!

If you are on the lookout for quality Italian takeaway, look no further than Malletti’s, quite simply a Soho institution.  Once you are introduced to it, you cannot help but pass on the knowledge to others. I trust you will now do the same.

Located on Noel Street, just behind the throng of Oxford Street, the eatery serves up freshly made pastas (always one meat, one veg option), risotto, and pizzas of all descriptions. Some left-field options might include calzone, Italian sausages and bread and butter pudding. Put simply, you are not left wanting for choice.

Yet the first impression you get of Malletti’s is one of pressing your nose up against a window as the lovely Sylvia takes your order from the back of the queue winding its way down the pavement. I cannot think of another example of this custom, which just adds to the charm of the place.

Upon moving inside you are met with large signs advertising the very much-justified ‘no mobile phones’ policy (why not more widespread I ask?), violation of which can result in a strong dressing down from behind the counter….

…From the ‘godfather of pasta’.

This man sums up Malletti’s. No-nonsense service. Clear pride in the quality of his goods. In a word, authenticity.

Above all else, Malletti’s distinguishes itself on the standard of its ingredients. In a world of shortcuts and food-on-the-cheap it stands out as a beacon of quality. 

The only issue to address could be pricing, though a clear distinction should be made. My preferred option, the pasta in either meat or vegetarian guise (or a mix), is a perfectly reasonable £4.95. The pizza however, does not come cheap at £3.95 for two relatively small pieces, despite maintaining a great standard.

Nevertheless the strong customer loyalty tells you all you need to know.

I very much enjoy my frequent trips to Malletti’s, usually justifying the carbohydrate intake by visiting the day before playing a football or cricket match. The flip side to this is a full-scale post lunch malaise, as the body gets to work on the quantity of pasta I have forced it to consume. I am soon to try its thriving Soho rival Adagio, but for now it is fair to say that Malletti’s reigns supreme if you seek quality Italian lunch-to-go.

And to the marks…

Taste 9

Portion size 7 (9 pasta, 5 pizza)

Service 9

Speed 8

Originality 8

Choice 9

Workability 5

Office response 10

Value for money 7  (8 pasta, 6 pizza)

Brand 8

Overall: 80%

Mizuna Salad

Venue: Mizuna Salad, Charlotte Street

Food: Salads (and a whole lot more...Jackets, Sandwiches, Lasagne....)

Cost: £3.75

Rating: 79%

www.mizunasalad.com

Mizuna Salad may not look like too much from the outside, but do not be fooled. The choice and value for your pound is mighty impressive.  A family owned little gem set on fashionable Charlotte Street, Mizuna is the place to come for a hearty salad, but also offers anything from sandwiches and jacket potatoes to specials including lasagne and curries.

Entering Mizuna it is abundantly clear the place is not quite big enough for a comfortable fit. Slightly cobbled together, but in a way that gives it a real home-made feel, the till is plonked smack bang in front of the entrance, around which customers mill about and bump into each other awkwardly.

After you have shuffled your way through bodies, and somehow without ever really joining a defined queue (although I am sure the intention is one queue for salads and one for everything else), you reach the well-marshalled serving counter.

Although I have sampled most options, I am always drawn to the salads and in particular the chicken Caesar salad, rustled up from scratch in no time at all. Generous in size, a good mix of ingredients, certainly tasty and with the added bonus of a sense of healthy eating, regardless of the levels of Caesar dressing!

Be sure to bump into a few more customers while deciding on an appropriate waiting spot - I once had to shift my position four times during one such wait - and then inevitably a few more on the way to the till, before paying a very reasonable £3.75 (or something similar for any other selection).

Mizuna Salad could be described as ‘the people’s takeaway’. In short, it represents good quality at an affordable price for under-pressure media types.

Taste 8

Portion size 8

Service 7

Speed 9

Originality 7

Choice 10

Workability 8

Office response 7

Value for money 9

Brand 6

Overall: 79%

Make Mine

Venue: Make Mine, Dean Street

Food: Ciabatta (various)

Cost: £4.75

Rating: 75%

www.makemine.co.uk

A staple of the Soho sandwich brigade circuit, Make Mine blends the care of a hand-produced sandwich with a production line of near Germanic efficiency.

To enter Make Mine for the first time is to confront a menu of bewildering proportions. Ciabatta/foccacia and sandwiches with 14 varied fillings. A wrap/salad menu boasting 14 more (with minimal crossover). Or if by some miracle your choice is not covered, the ability to construct your own is on offer!

Just as well then that Make Mine possesses a comically small serving area to place your order, allowing you a moment to gather your thoughts as you inch towards the counter…

Once you reach the front of the queue I wholeheartedly endorse the ciabatta option, with the Soho Club, Schnitzel or Cajun fillings, which all feature chicken in some guise. If you don’t like chicken in your sandwich, then feel free to ignore this recommendation.

Always raising a smile are the ‘New’ tags alongside fillings which have been offered for well over 15 months. Once a clever marketing ploy…it must now be time for a new menu board!

Service is pretty standard, the conveyor belt style fostering an impersonal culture and lack of soul by its very nature.  Orders are taken with minimum fuss, taking your name for that ‘personal’ touch (more to follow on that) and passed along to the sandwich ‘creators’ behind the counters. 

Upon completion, your sandwich is wrapped and your name summoned. It appears however, that half of Make Mine’s customers share my name, cue much confusion and on two occasions, a wrong sandwich picked up!

Nevertheless, hefty fillings emerge within a toasted ciabatta and the end product is consistently good.  The place is a nightmare around 1pm as the entirety of Soho drops by, but if you can get past a cluttered shop, Make Mine does exactly what it sets out to do…a good sandwich. If you wanted originality, you wouldn’t be buying a sandwich.

The chief downside is price. £4.75 is a significant mark up on other sandwich shops, but probably worth it to move beyond the offerings of Eat and Pret.  Recently adding a breakfast menu, which I will be sure to report on, Make Mine is a strong and solid lunchtime option without setting the culinary world alight.

Taste 8

Portion size 9

Service 6

Speed 7

Originality 6

Choice 10

Workability 8

Office response 7

Value for money 6

Brand 8

Overall: 75%

Papaya

Venue: Papaya - 14 St Annes Court

Food: Thai Curry

Cost: £3.90

Rating: 82%

The next step in my Grabalunch diet of reviews takes me to Papaya and their Thai curries, without doubt one of my favourite takeaway joints in Soho. In a nutshell it is tasty, swift, great value, with generous portions and the place that I historically bring a visitor to grab a quick lunch in Soho.

Papaya is certainly no secret, even if surprisingly large amounts of people do not know of its delights.  It can guarantee a sizable, often huge, queue continuously from around midday till 2pm, winding its way down the St Annes Court alley.  Fear not, the queue moves at rapid pace and the aroma drifting out of the small interior is more than enough to keep you waiting expectantly in line.

Once inside, the food counter presents you with an impressive choice. Not every one of the curry options (cooked fresh in bulk) will be to everyone’s taste but the range of options is more than enough to satisfy any customer. From your standard Thai green and red curries through to massaman via cashew nut, red beef and panang, the selection is fantastic and end product consistently top notch.  Pad Thai is also an option – they are hidden away below the counter, although are probably not quite of the same high standard. Additional extras include decent prawn crackers, various Thai starters/extras and sushi, though I must confess to rarely indulging beyond the curry and crackers.

Almost before you have a moment to consider your options, the legend that is the chap responsible for serving the masses at breakneck speed will have shouted in your general direction “Next please, yes Sir/Madam”, to which (after a pause of confusion as to whether it is in fact you being asked) you must announce your choice and receive a resounding “Hai” in acknowledgment. Pass by at 3pm for him taking a well-deserved cigarette break.

Portion size is phenomenal, with vast quantities of meat shovelled in a rice box, forming a compact takeaway eating unit.  Price is even better, with each curry costing only £3.90, which I can assure you for a hot, large lunch in Soho represents an absolute steal.

I was first introduced by MJD a few years ago and have been a regular ever since. Every person I have introduced to Papaya has been similarly glowing in praise for the food. On a side note there is definitely a market in Soho for a similar Indian curry version, although quite how productive afternoons would be after such a meal is anyone’s guess.

Taste 8

Portion size 10

Service 8

Speed 8

Originality 7

Choice 9

Workability 7

Office response 9

Value for money 10

Brand 6

Overall: 82%